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Sweet Jesus, show me what I am hiding from.
I can feel the edges, the shape of the thing but cannot see through the bag it is hiding in.
I know that it is detouring my thoughts to a place I would rather not traverse.
I know that I want to hide, to not be known.
I am hiding my small self between words, collapsing into someone elses thoughts.
I feel as if I am behind a barred window, rattling the casing.
Stab holes in my shell so I can see past myself into You
You are my beacon and i will gravitate toward you always.

You are the evening sun that warms me while I watch my son play
You are the kiss of the breeze on my shoulder
You are the smell after a new rain on the pavement
You are the joy that bubbles in my throat when I see all that I have been given
You are the reds and the blues, the grays and greens
You inhabit the deepest part of me and help me see your creation as you made it
You are a divine Creator
Wonder and breadth cannot explain
You are in the delicate and the bold
The wings and the flight
You see all things, Master of all things
Your detail is in the plumage of the fowl and the legs of a stallion
You encompass power and beauty
Your nature defines the universe
Your love the definition of praise
My love for you soars beyond my lips
I cannot express in words your ability to move me, to wildly praise you
I pursue you with reckless abandon

Lord, please grant me the promises in Ephesians.
I need your power and your life.
I need your wisdom to steer my
My situation seems impossible but within you there are no walls
Search my heart and tell me what is right.
I do not want to harm
But I have to ask the question
When is enough enough?
I am to love at all times but when do I stop and place boundaries?
How do I decide the difference between need and manipulation.
Lord this decsion is too big for me
My heart is too involved.
Please make my path evident and my heart sure.
Give me contentment in whatever you decide.

little ole me

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